7 Ways to Cope with Bad Body Image Days

Richard Wollboldt Photography

We've all been there - some days we look in the mirror and feel fine as hell. Other days we wonder where that hot bitch went and why she was replaced with a troll (IDK maybe that’s just me??)

That gremlin in our brains is loud and incredibly rude.

Logically I KNOW that I’m healthy and my body is simply a tool to do the cool shit I want to do - like workout, walk the dogs, or coach CrossFit classes.

Though I logically understand the functionality of my body and LOVE what it can do, I still hear that gremlin voice whispering in my ear.

Instead of letting these thoughts take over and ruin my day, I've learned techniques that help me love myself so I can focus on more important things.

Below are some of the strategies I lean on when I have a bad body image day - because hot girls don't have time to feel bad about their bodies simply for existing. There's too much shit we have to get done 🫡.

1. Get off social media

It’s impossible not to play the comparison game when scrolling through social media. You sit on the toilet or shovel food into your mouth while mindlessly scrolling through the ‘gram. In a matter of minutes you've seen countless humans who seemingly live happy & perfect lives - all while looking absolutely stunning.

Then the thoughts creep in - if Emily's a successful elite athlete and she has shredded abs and no visible body fat AND can deadlift 400 pounds, then I also need to look like Emily to be an elite athlete and deadlift 400 pounds.

But the math ain't mathin. I don't actually know a single thing about Emily, her lifestyle, how she eats/ trains, or what her genetics are like. Also for all I know Emily edits her images, changes the lighting, or only posts the pictures where she looks a certain way.

We often forget that socials are SO curated. We (myself included) share moments at our best - we post PR videos and images that make us look strong, tan, and fit. We don't often see humans ACTUALLY being human. Through filtering, lighting, and curation we are exposed to just one side of the story. 

To minimize our exposure to these seemingly perfect people we actually know nothing about, try deleting your social media apps for a day or two (if not longer). If you need it for work purposes, keep it on your laptop to still give you an outlet. BUT not having it instantly accessible removes the mindless scrolling. You now have to make a conscious effort to open your laptop and pull it open.

The less you see curated content, the less you’ll compare yourself to unrealistic standards. Out of sight out of mind, baby!!

2. Look at training videos with intentionality

I like to get into this fun little cycle of recording my lifts, then tearing apart everything about myself OTHER than the lift:)

Put your hand in the air if this sounds familiar! 

I remember telling my pal as a joke "nothing makes me feel shittier about myself than filming a lift from the ground up."

LIKE HOW SILLY! What a dumb way to make myself feel bad.

When you take training videos try to eliminate any factors that might trigger self-destructive thoughts. If you know setting your phone at a certain camera angle usually makes you feel insecure, don't set the camera up there!

When you go to review the video intentionally focus on using the video as a training tool. If you recorded the video because your snatch feels funky - break the video down into the different segments of your pull, then give yourself 1 positive takeaway from the video and 1-2 things to work on. This makes the session more productive while leaving your sense of self in-tact.

Having intentionality with reviews gives more focus to what you're doing and helps quiet the gremlin in your brain.

3. If the scale is triggering, burn it (ok don't actually burn it - that's dramatic)

If stepping on the scale makes you have a bad day - don't step on a scale. If having a full-length mirror in your bedroom makes you second-guess your life, put it somewhere else.

It sounds silly but the less you expose yourself to triggering behavior, the less you're going to be triggered 🤷🏼‍♀️.

Here we need to do a little cost-benefit analysis. Is stepping on the scale providing you value you can't get elsewhere? In this specific instance - unless you're in a very weight-specific sport - the answer is no. If you're trying to track nutrition progress there are so many other ways to assess change - fluctuations in energy levels, how clothing fits, progress photos, etc.

Only participate in activities that feel good to you. We may logically understand that different factors influence weight changes - water retention, stress levels, barometric pressure, etc - but if seeing that number on the scale is going to ruin your day, there is NO point.

4. Wear clothes that make you feel comfortable & confident

The clothing industry is tough. Every single company sizes things differently. You may comfortably fit in a small pair of leggings from Company X, but be a medium at Company Y. 

Distance yourself from the numerical size and go based on feel. Does the waistline dig into your hips? Do you feel like you could run, jump, and play without feeling discomfort? Do you like the colors and overall vibe of your outfit? If you answered no, change your outfit and maybe donate those clothes entirely

If a low-waistband makes you feel self-conscious of your stomach, wear high-waisted! Find the fit that makes you feel comfortable. If you feel uncomfortable in your clothing you're opening the gate wide-open for that little gremlin to come creep into your brain and start whispering awful things in your ear.

If you don't own anything that makes you feel comfortable and confident, donate the clothes that don't fit the way you like and go shopping! I know money is a huge factor here, so take this with a grain of salt. I highly recommend consigning clothes - donate what doesn't work and replace it with something that makes you feel like the hottest person in the room.

5. Set goals that have nothing to do with your appearance

If you solely focus on hitting a certain number on the scale or leaning out until your ab veins pop, you're setting yourself up for failure.

Because what happens when you reach that goal? Are you instantly going to love the way you look? Probably not. The same insecurities can creep in regardless of what the scale says.

We also may not realize that the number in our brain is probably not the weight our bodies actually need to be at.

I'm the heaviest I've ever been and feel the best I ever have. For SO long I hyper-fixated on the idea that my worth is equivalent to a number on the scale. If I sit below 130 -> I'm more valuable as a human and athlete. 

AND GIRLLLLLLL was I wrong. Below 130 I'm cranky, hungry, and sad. Sitting at 136 (and still actively trying to get heavier) I feel more energetic, I don't go on weekend binges, and I actually like the way I look and feel in my body.

The idea of separating my worth from a number on the scale and focusing on what my body can DO helped me minimize pointless fear arising from a number.

Your goals can range anywhere from - "I want to hit a 300+ pound deadlift," to "I want to get through the day without feeling like a zombie after 2pm." Then once you hit these goals, continue to evolve and build your list of goals. This provides more growth opportunities rather than feeling like you have nothing to reach for after hitting that goal number.

6. Remind yourself that there is absolutely NO certain way that your body SHOULD look

The idea of the 'perfect body type' is a made up phenomenon. Just look at how these societal ideals have changed over the years.

In the 90s everybody wanted to be teeny-tiny and thin. Once the Kardashians popped up the 'tiny-waist, big bootie' ideal popped up.

The only way your body SHOULD look is the way it looks. PERIODT. If you're genetically tiny or genetically bigger on the bottom, then amazing! That's what your body should look like!

I'll always carry more weight on my bottom half - I always have regardless of what weight I sit at (ranging from 100 pounds to 140 pounds).

Let's stop comparing ourselves to body types we'll simply never have and start embracing the body that we're in.

7. Change your dialect

Societally we equate physical appearance with well-being. If someone loses weight, it's so natural to comment "omg you look so great!!"

BUT by doing so we're continuing to push the narrative that weight loss = health regardless of how this person lost weight or if they even wanted to lose weight.

By commenting on someone's appearance (either positively or negatively) we're reinforcing the societal standards we want to move away from.

ALSO we don't know the whole story. Who knows whether that person lost weight in a healthy way or whether they even wanted to lose weight in the first place. By commenting on something we know nothing about, we're reinforcing the idea that there’s a ‘right way to look’ and a ‘wrong way to look’.

Last year when I came out to Vegas, we went to a show on the Strip (10/10 recommend - amazing combo of cirque & raunchy humor). The host commentated on how skinny I looked compared to other gals I was with (who are SO strong and I look up to all of them).

I've been SO self-conscious of my upper-body since then - just a reinforced concept that you never know what body image struggles someone's dealing with.

Keep in mind that you never know what someone’s dealing with and words can have lasting damage, regardless of intention.

Next time you look in the mirror and hear that gremlin in your ear, try a couple of the above methods and see what works. The cool thing about being human is that we’re all different - not the same methods work for everyone.

Try different approaches and see what works for YOU as an individual!

Queen Megan the Stallion put it best: “bad bitches have bad days too.” BUT don’t let these bad days get the best of you - there’s too much hot girl shit to do.

stay rad 🤘🏻

-s

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